First thing’s first: no one you know watched The Bachelor.

And certainly not us. We’re better than that. And we know it.

But across Australia last night, 1.68 million people did (peaking at 1.87 million). That’s up 14 per cent on the previous season.

It was also the third top trending twitter handle. In the world.

Many of the viewers last night vote. Probably most. Many would also operate vehicles. Some may even hold positions of responsibility, so there is a lot to be concerned about from a public policy and public safety perspective.

But according to media reports … there was no ‘winner’. Ain’t that the truth. Apart from Ten’s bottom line.

Instead of winding up with one rejected woman and one loved-up couple, who always serve nicely as an antidote to the heartbreak of said rejected woman, we’re left with three single people. Two of them are heartbroken, angry and confused, and the other one can’t seem to find his words – and he’s skipped the country, so we can’t even ask him to explain.

This is not how things were supposed to go.

Actually, this is how things often go. The Bachelor has just cut out the middle man.

Most importantly, this might put an end to the reign of the Honey Badger.

This has occurred in four parts:

The honey badger video (language warning)

The nickname was born.

The Honey Badger mashup

The ‘personality’ took shape.

The advertisements

The dash for cash was on. And hit hard.

The Bachelor

And it ended with a fizzzzzzzzzzzz.

The final curtain?

We’ve seen his shtick, had a laugh. Unless he has something more to give, time is up. And judging by what has been seen so far, in the words of contestant Brittany: “What a giant waste of time that was.”

(Sweatin’ like a gypsy with a mortgage … damn that’s funny … racist. But funny.)